Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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