Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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