I'm drive I can fine osifer
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
