No awkward lesbian experiences without me
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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