somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Randomize
