3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
