before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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