He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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