you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
