When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
