i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
