we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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