508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
