Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
If I die, sorry about rent.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
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