Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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