Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
We have so much sex to catch up on
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Randomize
