So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
