you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
