I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
