Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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