ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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