trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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