I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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