Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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