We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
