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• (847): View more from Illinois

  dude, osama threatened the US again

  (1-847): View more from Illinois

  dude. i slept with your sister last night

  (847): View more from Illinois

  what?

  (1-847): View more from Illinois

  I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.

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• (434): View more from Virginia

  Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...

  (434): View more from Virginia

  I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade

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• (802): View more from Vermont

  No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  How did it go last night?

  (647): View more from Ontario

  Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?

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• (914): View more from New York

  Oh god. Standing was a rash decision

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...

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• (310): View more from California

  I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable

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• (607): View more from New York

  I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.

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• (269): View more from Michigan

  I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?

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• (407): View more from Florida

  Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia

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