Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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