A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
