barbara walters just said penis...
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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