This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
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