We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
