what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Randomize
