I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
