The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Randomize
