she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
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