Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
