Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Randomize