I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize