I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
