It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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