My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
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