It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Randomize
