Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(734): View more from Michigan

y did u give ur computer a hand job?

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(919): View more from North Carolina

so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.

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(205): View more from Alabama

TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.

(205): View more from Alabama

better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(443): View more from Maryland

you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen

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(303): View more from Colorado

Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..

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(720): View more from Colorado

A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.

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(813): View more from Florida

He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.

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