Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
