oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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