but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
