I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Randomize
