i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
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i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
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Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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