have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Randomize
