Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Randomize
