Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Randomize
